3 April, 2008

Introducing: An Angry Pelican… (and other things that piss me off)

Posted in Environmentalism, Uncategorized tagged , , at 12:42 pm by crazyredd101

As I was fishing with my dad, (for the record: I am an animal lover, but I’m okay with fishing as long as laws regarding size and seasons are respected) he accidentally hooked a pelican. The plan of action when one hooks a bird is to run to the bait shop and borrow a hoop net. You would then lower it into the water, scoop the bird into it and slowly bring the bird up. While holding bird’s beak closed and gently restraining the wings you would push the hook through the skin and cut off the barb. Once you are sure the bird does not have any line wrapped around its wings and is not ill you would release it.

As seasoned fishermen people we are used to doing this, so when others face the problem of hooking a bird we help out. What do you know, that same day, a man close to us hooked a pelican. I ran over and told him I would run to the bait shop and grab the net. He said, “Chill out,” he’d just cut the line. I was like, “Uhh no!” I explained to him very calmly that the fishing line was wrapped around the pelicans beak and if we didn’t get it off the bird would not be able to breathe or eat and it would die. His response was, “I honestly don’t give a damn”. I, again very calmly, explained to him that I honestly wanted to punch him in the face but I chose not to, as he would choose not to cut the line lest he wished to have me kick his balls up his throat.

He must have taken my threat seriously because when I returned with the net he had not cut the line. I proceeded to unhook the line and had the pelican taken to the bird sanctuary to make sure it was okay. As I was walking away he chose to mutter a comment along the lines of, “Stupid Bitch, I should have just cut the line”. I spun around and proceeded to curse him out. I’ve never before or since used the phrase douche-fuck as many times as I did that day. The fact that even after I explained that the bird would die if he cut the line and that it was a threatened species he still did not care made me very angry. I explained to him that if I ever saw him cut a line with a bird on it I would take down his license plate number and report him for animal abuse. At that point of time I decided that I hate all people, I have since changed my mind and decided that I just hate d-bags. Moral of the story: don’t cut lines when you hook a bird.

Don’t piss me off,



“HELP FOR HOOKED BIRDS.” Seabird Sanctuary. Suncoast Seabird Sanctuary. 31 Mar 2008 <http://www.seabirdsanctuary.org/hookedbirds.htm&gt;